A little death around the eyes

Halloween nightmares verge on the surreal,
Halloween daydreams of death and remorse,
My brittle bones, my torn up skin,
I am a zombie, set on my demonic course.

Chewed up victims, weary fools,
No longer moving, they lay, alone.
Blood thirsty, ravenous, my mouth foams,
Violence and sufferings set the tone.

Ghost and ghouls haunt my tired eyes,
I see things non-existent, I hear things not real,
Loud noises from my room, chaos and despair,
I cant understand what I’m unable to feel.

Halloween night, Im dressed as myself,
Worse than any monster, scarier than any sinister tale,
The world is collapsing, economy in turmoil,
My surroundings a nightmare on a sickening scale.

Im no more certain than alive,
Today I lost my purpose,
today I lost myself,
Death at the side of the one I love.

Smiles all round as my insides crack,
My life now bleak by my mothers side,
Depressed family, one more added.
I lay in bed, alone.

The microphone in my hand, i had nothing to say.
Of life and lust and futures untold,
Nothing came out except my lost jumper,
Another day goes by that I have not lived.

The poor zombie rots in his room,
Too depressed to leave, too afraid to stay.
Yet the shy grin remains,
My mother needs me to live.

We can't multitask, we can't compete,
Men not needed, our lives unsure,
Uncertainty a lie on the ones we meet,
Hedonism, our only cure.

Squeal of vermin, fickle fiends,
Sucking the life out of my pale neck,
I lost my faith in womanhood,
I lost my faith.

Tremulous heart is put to the test,
Mother gone bald, yet I remain,
A lump on her tainted chest,
Somehow I stay the same.

Last night I crawled into a hole,
My brain without vigor, too much thought,
Lack of sleep, lack of soul,
Depression, like a beast I fought,
Alone.